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Streets
by
Kimra Traynor Herb
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Forgetting deadlines

My oldest son is pure mellow when it comes to time. He is as relaxed as can be about any deadline- to him, "hurry" in the morning means to take a 20-minute shower instead of a 30-minute one if school starts in 30 minutes. He comes by this trait honestly enough. My mom and I still talk about the band potluck supper and presentation evening which started at 6 PM back when I was in high school. Everyone had eaten, put their plates in the trash, and were listening to the band director announcing awards when the sound of a two pairs of high heels clicking across the gym floor interrupted a quiet moment. It was my future mother and sister in law. Though it was 7 PM the two of them sailed into the room in a glorious cloud of oblivion and began stacking their plates with the food still left on the table. Waving to friends, they, the glorious late-arriving belles of the ball, took seats among the others and began enjoying their meal with no notice that non one else was still eating. This is how it goes in my husband's family: my in-laws barely squeaked in to my  husband's graduation from college, were a full hour late for my wedding rehearsal, and, no worries- this is just how they live their lives. My son is cut straight from that cloth, despite my better attempts at trying to speed him along.
My middle son thinks time is merely a guideline- generally one should try to improve that guideline by minutes, preferably hours, most preferred: many hours. He lives in constant fear of a "tardy unexcused"- a late arrival to school with no good reason could send him into a hyperventilating fit from which he would not be likely to recover for some time. He comes by this behavior honestly enough, as well. My mom's side of the family is NEVER late- anywhere, and by "never late" I mean: generally hours early. Long before 9/11 and long check-in lines at the  airport, my mom had to be at least two hours early for a flight- that is if she couldn't get there before that. My mom and my aunt build at least several hours into any trip for any impending disasters which "could" happen and frequently arrive before set up crews for various events. They get as nervous as can be when they are trying to figure out how long it will take to get some place- oh the unspoken horror of being even a moment late- well, it is a horror that they will never know. My poor middle son lives on this accelerated pace- he mustn't even CONSIDER arriving at the appointed time when he could indeed be early.
It is a cruel twist of fate which has brought these two together for a shared ride to high school every morning. My oldest, the driver, thinks nothing of waiting until ten minutes before school is to start before heading out the driveway. Wringing his hands, my middle son is nearly frantic every morning at the gut-wrenching thought that this day may be the day he will fall victim to the dreaded "tardy unexcused." My middle son is reliant on his laid back brother to ferry him to all their shared activities, and I believe the experience is nearly giving him an ulcer. Last weekend the boys had an out of town band contest. My husband, myself, my middle son, and my youngest spent the morning at a soccer game, went to the gym and worked out, swam in the pool, went out for lunch and returned home. By this time it was 12:30 PM. The older two boys were due at the band room at 1:30, and my middle son was chomping at the bit. Imagine his horror when we walked in the house and found my eldest still in bed!
"ERRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" My middle son yelled, practically gnashing his teeth and pulling his hair out of his head. "HOW CAN HE STILL BE SLEEPING?!!!!! WE'RE GOING TO BE LATE!!!!!"
Wiping the sleep out of his eyes, my oldest quipped, "Chill dude." And disappeared into the shower for about a half an hour while my middle son melted under the pressure of waiting for his ride.

It will be a happy day for my early bird when my procrastinating lounge lizard heads off to college. "I will be able to drive myself everywhere, and I can always be good and early!" He dared to dream the other day when he realized his reliance on his brother for a ride would end in a couple of years. 
”And I won't have to have you breathing down my back every second telling me it is time to leave." My oldest happily replied.