Side Streets, Kimbra Traynor Herb, 6-30-01. 861 words
The Case of the Missing 30 Pounds
By Kimbra Traynor Herb
IPS Features
If someone had told me, a year ago, that by the fourth of July this year I would have lost thirty pounds, reaffirmed family priorities and become a more organized person, I would have told them to get out of town and to take my extra thirty pounds with them. Life is funny that way; we never seem to know what is lurking around the corner.... good or bad. I was talking to an acquaintance of mine last weekend who has professed to me in the past to "LOVE summer!" This woman has said that summer is the most relaxing time of the year for her, and she loves having her children at home with no stress to be found anywhere.
Since she is a
school teacher by profession, she likes to have the summer to regroup and most
of all, she enjoys knowing that her son, who is autistic, does not have to
endure the stress of trying to fit into a world which he does not understand. So
I figured, when I approached her, that we would have a grand old time discussing
the merits of summer and having the kidlets around, and looked forward to her
providing an uplifting affirmation of the season. "How is your summer going
so far?" I asked, cheerfully, just knowing her answer was going to be
positive.
"Horrible."
She groaned. "Not one thing has gone right. Our car has been in the shop
all summer, and I don't get paid in the summer so naturally there is no money. I
am trapped in my house and can never get out.... not that there would be any
money to go anywhere anyway."
?But," I
interjected, "aren't you so happy that the kids are out of school? Aren't
you enjoying not having to stress about your son and the other kids?"
"No."
She answered, flatly. "He has been driving me crazy."
From there I
didn't know what to say. Having no experience in dealing with the autistic, I am
sure that any words of comfort I could offer would probably be small comfort. I
told her that I hoped her summer would get better and left it at that.
On one level, I
knew how she felt- I too have been overwhelmed by home concerns and can let
pressures affect my attitude towards life. It's something I have to work at on a
daily basis, and remaining focused and positive isn't always easy.
Thank goodness
our forefathers remained focused and positive. How easy it would have
been, back during the day of British rule, to throw up their hands in despair
and to cry in the corner. If they had, I suppose that today I would be walking
around singing "God Save the Queen" instead of figuring out where to
view fireworks where the sound will be minimal (my five year old hates the
"booms!") and how to coordinate my outfit for the day around the stars
and stripes theme. Heck, for that matter, I would probably not even be
here...... my family, a true melting pot of Irish, German, Swiss and who knows
what else would probably still be in "the old country" picking
potatoes or making cheese. Mind boggling. Independence
Day- one day to celebrate and to remember that many, many lives have been given
so that my greatest worry this day is how to incorporate those star spangled
shoes into my ensemble. The positive "can do" attitude of many
generations before me which has shaped this nation and has allowed me the
freedom to be the person I strive to be.
A speaker I
listened to last week said that if you go through life focusing on all the
obstacles; you will surely hit at least some of them in your concern to avoid
them. Instead, he stressed, you need to focus on the clear path.... no matter
how tiny it may seem.... so that you may navigate life's journey as cleanly as
possible and without dwelling on the "bumps and logs" life throws in
the path from time to time. I thought while I was listening to him that he was
right; and that had I focused, at the beginning of my diet last February, on all
the foods I could no longer eat, and how much I did NOT want to exercise, most
likely I would have never gotten started at all. And all that "post
baby" (five years later) flub would still be hanging around on my body
about now. Instead, I tried to think about how great it would feel to finally
shed that "baby fat" and become a healthier person. Little by little I
learned to drink water, eat fruits and vegetables, and not feel deprived in the
process. Sort of an independence from chips and dip (the vilest of all dictators
in my life)..... on a daily basis.
By this time
next year, I hope to have lost an additional ten pounds and to have begun
writing seriously on that book I have been talking about since college. Lofty
goals- but I am optimistic that in a land like America, anything is possible.