7-26-02, Side Streets, Kimra Traynor Herb

The Ballgame Changes with Age
By Kimra Traynor Herb
IPS Features


The difference between playing ball when you are young, and playing ball when you are, well, not as young, is the TALK. In the old days, the high school and before glory years; all the talk was of victory. Winning. Scoring. Mega-hits and super plays. These days, the talk in our family circulates around medical jargon and injuries.

Last week, my brother, the multi-talented Eric, came to town for a brief visit. He planned his trip around a church softball game at my church. "Do you think they will let me play?" He asked, eagerness tinging his voice. My brother, along with my little sis, had been the shining apples of my father's eye when they were young. While I was busy decorating the playhouse and writing really stupid plays for the neighborhood kids to put on; my brother and sister were hitting home runs in the All-Star games. When I joined the ranks of the baseball playing Traynors, my best season resembled a nightmare downslide for either of them. My brother, like my father before him, REALLY likes to play ball. So participating in a church softball game sounded like Eric's idea of a great day.

"I am sure they will." I said, looking at my brother who had bloomed from his skinny auburn headed high school self into a huge hulking presence of a man in his late thirties. One look at his tree trunk arms and the other team would go running for the far outreaches of the outfield, I thought to myself.

As for myself, I have learned that the best church softball games are the ones in which I do not have to participate. Since women are, as a rule, scarce, it usually happens that no matter how much I protest, Coach Hayes will be calling me to the field. Once there, I spend all my energies trying to avoid getting hurt in any manner. If that means jumping OVER a line drive to avoid getting a bruise, then so be it. If staying well involves a weak throw to first so that one of my ten perfect nails do not break; well, the team has become used to such actions.

Luckily for me, the night in question the team was crawling with eager women who seemed not to mind at all the prospect of getting hurt. I was able to sit in the bleachers with the cheering crowd, and watch my brother as he took left field. The first fly ball he caught was done so with ease, and it seemed as if time had not changed a thing for the former Little League All-Star. The second fly ball, however, brought with it DANGER, and he had to run an impossible (to me) distance, only to dive and fall, holding up his glove; victorious, as he caught the ball.

During the game, he managed to catch any and all balls in his direction, and to secure two impressive doubles. It seemed that he still had the old magic. Until his playing time was up, and he limped off the field.

"Oh," he said in my direction, "I think I pulled my hamstring."

"That diving catch?" I asked, knowing full well that I would have stood there, 100 feet back and let the ball drop to safety, keeping my muscles intact for another day.

"Oh, yeah." He moaned. "Oh, my hammy!"

When we returned to my home, my husband, who was out of town on business called to check up on the progress of the game. We were happy to report that we had won, partly in thanks to Eric's contribution on the field, 20-4. "But, " I told my husband, "Eric had to make a diving catch and he pulled his hamstring."

"Tell him that last year I had to make a diving catch and I pulled my hamstring and hit the vagal nerve and I passed out cold on the field." My husband relayed.

"Man." My brother empathized. "I didn't pass out, but I wish I could have; it hurt so bad." The two continued to trade sports injury stories, via me, including my husband cracked ribs during soccer games and my brother's assorted torn muscles and skin.

Finally, I could stand it no longer. "I don't understand why you guys want to play!" I screamed into the mouthpiece of the phone. "All you do is get hurt these days!"

"But it's so fun!" My brother piped. "I've got to get me on a softball team back home; right away." He limped into the kitchen, moaning  about his "hammy" as he drug his bad leg behind him, apparently imagining the joys of playing another day just to tear another muscle or perhaps even break a bone.

"I can't wait until I get back." My husband was bitter at having had to miss an opportunity to wrench another body  part into oblivion. "Next week, I am going to do awesome." I imagined as he spoke the subsequent injuries of his actions; the previous week he had stretched a double into a triple; sliding into third and losing most of his thigh skin in the process. His leg had seeped for days through his pants and he wore the injury like I  would wear an exceptional pair of earrings; with pride.

The game has certainly changed from when we were young.

  -30-

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