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Hard work for the sake of hard work
Over the
years, my hubby and I have taught our three boys several
valuable life lessons. For example, my husband has installed in them the
value of hard work for the sake of hard work. Even as I write this, my
two
teenaged sons and my husband are over at our church, where they
have been
since 8 a.m. this Saturday morning, doing landscape work. My
husband's
theory is, if you make 'em work hard enough when they are young; they
won't
be afraid of it when they grow up and have to do it. Maybe one day
they'll
even appreciate this lesson that got forced on them by dear old dad.
Another one of my husband's contributions to the boys' development has
been
teaching them the value of a dollar. And how not to squander their
dough;
to carefully save and plan for major purchases and always, always,
squirrel
some money away for that rainy day which is surely just around the
corner.
This lesson was embraced by my oldest and my youngest; and met
with great
resistance by my middle son, the grasshopper who always seems to think,
"fiddle dee dee, there's always tomorrow to start saving- I want
some nice
collector's cards today!"- but even he is starting to put money in
his
savings account now- the picture of the despondent life of total
poverty
my hubby has painted has him worried that he might indeed end up living
in
a "van down by the river." My husband has also taught them
important
qualities like manners- always chew with your mouth closed- never
chomp a
meal- don't slurp, keep those elbows off the table, and these lessons
they
can carry with them for life. But I think, when they grow up and
take
stock of all they have learned at our hands as youth, it may be the
lesson
they learned from their mama that could mean the most to them.
Mama (me) says: never be afraid to be who you are.
Even if that
means being a big ole fool right out there in front of God and
everybody. I
don't just preach the message; I live it. The boys just spent a week
with
me watching my theories in action. While other mothers were busy mixing
up
vats of kool-aid and fingerpaint for crafts, their mother spent the past
week dressed in a large red foam lobster suit, jumping, singing and
snapping her claws. Every year at our vacation bible school, which we
hold
at a nearby YMCA camp and turn the event into a day camp experience; I
volunteer (okay demand) to be given the part of whatever mascot the
bible
school has. This year, it was a red lobster. I have to admit that the
roar
of excitement from the kids when they see "Scuba" dancing into
the room,
the castanets clicking within my giant pinchers to the beat of the
music,
is part of the reason I love it so much. Apparently, I am a natural born
nutball! Who knew? But the other part of the reason I love doing this so
much is that it shows all the kids, even my own, that it is OKAY to be
an
over the top fool- in fact, it is better than okay- it is FUN! The first
year I dressed up like this, my oldest son was a pre-teen and trying so
hard to figure out if he where he would fit in the whole cosmic universe
of
junior high school. It was pretty embarrassing that year when his dear
old
mom camp vamping it up in a crazy get up, saying weird things and right
there in front of his friends, too! But by this point in his life, five
years later, he has decided that it is pretty cool to be weird, and he
embraces my behavior as part of being in a "artsy" family.
The other day we were having a conversation, the boys
and I, about
growing up and finding your place in the world. I was saying that I was
proud that I was a nerd; that I had always been a nerd. My oldest son
piped
in that he was a nerd too; and proud of it; my middle son, said,
"Yeah, I
am a nerd too!" and from the back seat, perched on his booster
seat, my six
year old chimed in, "And I am a little nerd." My kids are
bullet-proof,
man. Because whenever any ole jock or pseudo-"cool" socialite
at school
ever opens their mouth and calls one of MY boys a 'nerd'- they'll be
like,
"thank you so very much; yes I am." Barbs like that become
compliments
thanks to a mother who dresses like a big red lobster on her free time
and
frolics with the kiddies like a wildwoman. This lesson will help them be
secure in their place in the world; as they find it they will realize
that
no answer is the "right" answer- that only if they are true to
themselves
with no regard to anyone else's perceptions will they truly be free. Oh
yeah. And they'll have money in the bank, and don't forget; they chew
with
their mouths closed. All thanks to some pretty good team effort
parenting.
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