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Danny |
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Okay, maybe not at a trot. And certainly not Atatürk. But even though the Turks may not quite yet be running up to speed, finally this past weekend the Turkish National Assembly voted to hop on board that midnight train to Baghdad (Note to Pips: Whoo!! Whoo!!). The US has been trying to nudge Turkey along the coalition trail ever since December when they gave some indication that they would not be allowing US troops to deploy from their soil for an incursion into Iraq. Of course we fly the “Northern-No-Fly-Zone” recon missions from Turkey, but they didn’t want actual ground troops, warring troops, launching an invasion from their country. Not even a little bit. Not even a slice. Well, they had their feathers ruffled slightly. We took the carrot and drumstick approach, and we can now count on them. And the cost? HA! Don’t ask. Prime Minister Abdullah Gul got THE phone call in Ankara this week from Dick Cheney, and shortly thereafter the Turkish position towards the coming war with Iraq took a decisive turn toward the US position. This is a government that’s only been in power a couple of months, and a political party that has not held the Prime Ministership before, so they are feeling their way along, sort of hunt and peck. They don’t want to lose out and have their hopes and dreams fricasseed. So of course the Vice President offered them more money than I normally carry with me- -over 26 Billion (yes, with a “B”)- -to help them in case they suffer any economic woes as a result of the coming hostilities. Hey!! I got your economic woes right here, pal. How does this happen? I’m not completely on board with this whole thing either. How about a couple of bucks in this direction? Oh, was that the tax cut? Did I miss something? So what’s the deal? If we can’t instill “World Peace and Harmony” as a cause for a coalition, heck, we’ll just buy one. I wonder how much France will want? Even more billions, I’m sure, and the Perrier concession for the nation-builders when the war is over? Okay- -raise your hand if you are sick of all the “dead-or-alive” posturing and the “Rumsfeld’s Blueprint For War” talk. Maybe some of the “Old Europeans” need help in raising their hands here. Ankara this week decided to stand with the US instead of their previous position as part of the “Old Europe”. Their border with Iraq runs right though the middle of the top of our military plans. Sure we have all the firepower in the world off in the waters of the Gulf region, but the tricky logistical position is in the north of Iraq where the Kurds hold sway- -I know- -Kurds and sway- -and since there are many there who would want to either take over Iraq, much to the chagrin of the Shiites in the south- -or- -even worse for Turkey- -bond with their brothers just over the Iraqi border into Turkey and form a completely autonomous state of Kurdland, or Kurdistan, or whatever they want to call it. And that would mean gobbling up a little territory from Turkey- -and guess what? The Turks want no part of this. But they do want to make sure the Iraq backdoor is closed and guarded no matter what happens. So- -“Yes, Mr Cheney- - -How much? We’d be happy to”. End of discussion. We have a long and convoluted history with the Turks, although we have been allies for the past fifty years. They were charter members of the United Nations in 1946 and have been in NATO almost all of its existence as well. They were neutral in World War Two- -that was during their “we’re not too sure about Hitler, maybe he IS a nice guy” phase. We fought against them in World War One. (See: Arabia, Lawrence of.) And we’ve been with’em and ag’in’em back and forth since The Crusades in the Eleventh Century (that would have been “ag’in’em”). Two thousand years ago, what is now modern day Turkey was the home to the first of the early Christian churches, like Antioch, Ephesus, Philadelphia, Laodicea and such. Antony and Cleopatra were married at Antioch in 40 BC- -that would be four years after the death of Julius Caesar on the The Ides of March (the 15th) in 44 BC. “I come to bury Caesar, not to praise him, or to praise him, you bury him” or whatever. Before the Romans, Alexander The Great ruled the land around 300 BC. And if you keep going back, they were the Biblical Hittites, always battling the Jews. Some things never change. Go far enough back and you’ll find Turkey- -ancient Anatolia- - was the scene of Noah’s Flood and the resting place of Noah’s Ark on Mount Ararat is in modern day Turkey. Yeah, it’s there- -up frozen in a glacier. (NOTE: read Pittman & Ryan’s Noah’s Flood for the latest archeological explorations- -the Cliff Notes version is in the National Geographic.) So now what? It’s Wheel of Fortune time- -but instead of vowels, we’re buying countries. It’s Byzantine!! Maybe we should just BUY Iraq. Who knows what’s next? I’m just going to have to wait and see. I will resist any references to cranberry sauce with my sandwich. I’m just going to get the TV remote and lean back in my chair with my feet up on the Ottoman.
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